Until the end
by Nezkov Sou
Summary: AkaKei. Birthday fic for Akaba. OneShot. I knew I was living in denial. I knew I was lying to myself. But I could not bring myself to ruin his life. This love would stay one-sided. Until the end...


Until the end

Disclaimer: I do not own ES21

A/n: Happy Birthday Akaba! Kakei loves you! Am I the first to ever post an AkaKei fanfiction here?

* * *

A party. Darn it.

I had never liked this kind of outings but I never had the excuse to not attend since it was always a club or school occasion. But this time, it's a birthday party. I did not planned on going but here I am, sitting among the roaring members of Kyoshin Poseidon and Bando Spiders. Both of our teams had been in friendly practices for a long time now and the members were more like best companions than opposing teams.

That was how I got myself stuck in this crowd who was high in their party moods, making me look rather odd by myself. A tired look, no huge smiles, no laughter. Just sitting at the table with a glass of soda. By my own. I knew that I was definitely out of place. Despite not wanting to be in any 'personal' parties, I could not bring myself not to come. It was Akaba Hayato's birthday. And for certain reasons, I willed myself to endure the crowds. Just to have a look of his smiling face.

Had it been three months since I first realize my feelings? Those feelings that I had for Akaba Hayato? At first, I did not understand it myself. Even when I did, I tried to tell myself that it was a lie. Love. It was love. And I did not want to believe it myself. Did not want to believe in myself. Two guys in love? There was no way that Akaba and I would work out. But after two months of self-denial, I finally came up to terms on accepting it. Accepting the fact that I was in love with him. The only and most bitter part was that I perfectly knew that this love would always stay as a one-sided love until the end. Seen me being all cozy with someone especially Akaba Hayato? Don't joke around.

My life would stay like this forever, revolving around studies and American Football. I never thought of sliding in any relationships or any private matters. It's the way I am. Kakei Shun, the high school student of Kyoshin Poseidon who was never seen with a date or even suspected of being in a relationship. So be it.

Sea blue eyes were reflected in the colourless soda which I was gazing at. But no matter what I told myself, I could no longer deny the aching pain that was slowly building inside me. Soon, I was sure that I would be swallowed up in that suffering agony. No, somehow I would make through no matter how long it would take, I would never surrender to a mere emotion. I would never surrender…

* * *

"Alright!! Shee you tsumorrow!!" Mizumachi droned, obviously near to being drunk, "Good tsunight!!"

Both Kyoshin's and Bando's students began to shuffle out of the restaurant, some being dragged, others swaying from left to right. When almost all of them had stepped out only did I realize that I was not the last one. Akaba had his forehead resting on the table, dozing away due to his drunken state.

"Wait a minute," I called out, "Who's taking Akaba home? We can't leave him here."

"Huh?" Koutarou glanced back, his cheeks flushed from alcohol too, "You take him. Coz he ain't smart."

And without anyone else commenting on the situation, I was left alone with an Akaba Hayato to send home. No way. The circumstances could not get any worse could it? No, this was the worst of all. I had not yet fully gain control of my life and emotions and with that mixed feeling, I had to carry the person that caused it and send him to his house. What did I do wrong to be punished in this way?

My eyes fell upon the sleeping form. His face was so peaceful, so angelic. A perfect being. The perfect being that I had fallen in love with. Why? Why must it be him? And why must it be me? What was the reason for it to be us? Why could not we just lead normal lives as… friends? No, this had nothing to do with Akaba. It was not his fault. It was me. I was the one who fell into a one-sided love. I was the one who felt this emotion towards him. I was the one who ruined my own life. And I was the only one who had to take responsibilities.

Sighing inwardly, I took hold of his right arm and threw it around my shoulders. We stumbled out of the restaurant into the cold night. I breathed out and glanced at the pink-haired leaning against me. From the close distance, his warmth radiated to me and I could smell a trace of his cologne overpowered by the wafts of alcohol. Maybe I was the only sober person in the party…

* * *

The apartment came to view and with the advantage of my well-built body, I hauled Akaba up the stairs to his floor and to the front of his home. This was the first time I visited his house and how decently it was only to drop his drunken body in and leave? No one was in and the entire house was dark and silent. I supposed he lived alone, just like myself.

I entered his bedroom, his body still leaning against me, and dragged him to his queen-sized bed. Carefully, I laid him down. He continued sleeping, having not a single care of the world around him. So serene…

Hesitantly, I leaned down and pressed my lips on his forehead. A simple peck. Nothing more. I pulled back slightly and whispered, "Happy Birthday…" before standing up straight. Giving a final gaze at him, I turned and left the house.

That was all that I could do. And when he was in a state of unconsciousness. I did not have the courage to tell him, knowing that he would hate me for it. I knew I was living in denial. I knew I was lying to myself. But I could not bring myself to ruin his life. This love would stay one-sided. Until the end…

* * *

The door clicked shut and crimson eyes cracked open, gazing blankly at the ceiling. A hand reached up and rested on the forehead; a sigh escaped the lips.

"If only I wasn't drunk and could move freely… I would have pulled him into a real kiss… Darn it Hayato… you wasted a chance…"


End file.
